A life lived

Wednesday 2nd January - the only thoughts we had were for the cremation service for my father at 1 o'clock that afternoon. With mother we had done our best to arrange a celebration of dad's life. Suzie and Angie were in charge of getting the food prepared for the wake. I'd been with mother to the undertakers to make sure she got the service she wanted for dad, and had been with her when the reverend Bates had called on his fact finding visit so that he could say a few words. The music, hymns and prayers were all chosen, family contacted and along with a few friends invited to the ceremony. Directions had been issued as few of those coming know their way across Derby to the Markeaton Crematorium where the service was to be held in the small chapel.

Angie and John had been first to arrive, not surprising as Angie was helping Suzie, and John soon got a call to go and be support to our sister Chris who was staying at the bungalow with mother for her few days in from the USA. Most folks were going direct to the crematorium, so we set off in good time to make sure we were there when the hearse arrived.

And everything went smoothly. We all ended up in the right place at the right time. It was a simple service but fittingly for father it was a brass tacks, no fuss celebration of his achievements, his life and our memories of him. When it was done we all convoyed back round the ring road to our place for the wake. It was good to have a family gathering, just a shame it was for another death in the family (the last one had been my mother's mum nearly 6 years earlier).

Since then we have had a few phone calls from those who attended - all positive about how well we had balanced the event and the day, a fitting tribute to a man struck down by Multiple Sclerosis, a debilitating affliction that robbed him of his retirement and condemned mother to spend her retirement years as his full time carer. As mother so candidly put it - he's had nearly 30 years of hell, he has been to hell and back, hopefully now he is in a better place.

RIP Dad.